5) 18th Sunday in Ordinary Time,
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Morning prayer and breakfast initiated my day that continued with morning devotion and morning prayer at the CPE program. Now, the spiritual care department is closer to the Brothers’ house, so I just walked down one minute to get there. We had discussion on the Verbatim of Dirk. At 10 to 11 a.m. I was at 3 West unit to attend round meeting with the nurses plus the chaplain, Dave. What they talked about mostly about the patients at 3 West. Actually, I just know one patient because it’s my secondary unity in which Dave shared with me two patients a day to visit. At 11 to 12 noon at the spiritual care office Dave presented his power point about satisfactory of patients on census or statistic system. At noon it was raining till evening. After having lunch, I did clinical visit to 6 West and 3 West units. There were about 18 patients I visited today. At the end I visited Brother Felix who is at the 2 East. I attended the Mass at 5.30 p.m., supper with the brothers and came back to the house to take my umbrella and went to Roncoli Center to take my bag and came back to my room. Now, it’s still raining outside there.
Morning prayer, breakfast, CPE morning prayer and morning report are my daily activities today. I presented my summary on the chapter 3 of Living Reminder by Henry Nouwen in the class discussion. At 11 to 12 noon, Digna explained us about the final evaluation for next three weeks. After having lunch at noon, I did visit about 17 patients at 6 West. While I was visiting the patients, some of them were watching baseball games in which CUB played in California or listening to the radio about this game. One Italian descent (84 years old) I visited, was very glad with my visit. Often times she kissed my hands. I gave her communion. One Greek Orthodox lady told me how she makes the sign of the cross in her tradition. She noticed my sign of cross I made is different with hers. I learned how the Greek Orthodox tradition makes the sign of cross with the right hand that symbolized the Trinity. Here, there is little talk about our traditions. She was very grateful to my presence and my prayer for her. One 94 years old man was praying some devotion prayers from some little prayer books. Tomorrow he will have his 94 years birthday. She has very joyful face with his smile as I visited him for the third time. One 89 years old man, who was ex Third Order of OCD (Order of Carmelite Discalced) told me many stories of him, how he converted to Catholicism and became very devoted. He’s ready to die in his stomach cancer. He’s listening to radio of baseball (CUB) when I entered his room because he couldn’t see clearly the TV. His future hope is to live in his house and preparing himself to die either in his house or hospice. I am impressed to his peaceful feeling and openness to his future hope. I guess this will be my fourth Verbatim for next week.
Today is the day of prayer for the Alexian Brothers, a sort of retreat day. So, they have different schedule. Since they started with Mass at 8 a.m., so I could woke up later than usual. I woke up at 6.30 a.m. then took shower and prayed personally at the chapel. I had breakfast by myself. At 8 a.m. I went to CPE program as usual with the morning devotion and report by Dirk who had on-call service last night. Annie presented her third Verbatim in our class. At 10 to 11 a.m. I went to my 6 West unit to attend round but there’s no round, so I did visit some patients and gave communion. It’s good that I could see some patients who discharged this morning. I could give them communion before they left. At 11 a.m. to 12.15 p.m. Digna, our supervisor presented her power point about communication. I returned a book I have borrowed from the ABMC library, a book written by Andrew Lester that I used for writing reflection as the CPE summer unit requires in the beginning. Thanks God I have done three and half pages of this reflection that will be due at the end of the program. After having lunch, I did clinical visits at 6 West and 6 East. I did the visits faster than usual because today there was not that many new patients to be visited. I attended the Mass at 5.30 p.m. at the hospital chapel and had supper with the brothers. I spent my evening with reading newspaper and magazine as well as had conversation with Brother Jim Darby (84). I gave my personal websites and personal e-mail address to him so that he can see my photos and weekly journal. At 10 p.m. I entered my room and typed this journal. Tomorrow is my day-off and I will go to Saint Alexius Medical Center at Hoffman Estate. I am invited by Brother Eugene (74) who has offered me since some weeks ago in the beginning I stay here at the Alexian Brothers. He will show me many other facilities of Alexian Brothers provide at SAMC (Saint Alexius Medical Center).
In my visits today, I met the last time the patient who is Greek Orthodox and as I prayed with her the Lord’s Prayer in English, suddenly she prayed it in Greek. She is the one who taught me how to make sign of cross in her tradition. Most of the patients who like to receive communion with their full of gratitude are elderly patients and this week I am impressed by some old men and one of them I shared on my fourth Verbatim. He gave me inspiration to write down my Verbatim for next Monday.
Friday, July 29, 2005.
Morning prayer, breakfast and laundry are what I am doing this morning while I am on day-off today because tomorrow is my on-call service as a chaplain. At 9 a.m. as we arranged some days ago, Brother Eugene and I went to some Alexian Brothers’ clinics around the suburbs area and he gave a tour to Saint Alexius Medical Center at Hoffman Estate, about 20 minutes away from the ABMC. He introduced me to those places and people there that I’m a CPE student at the ABMC and a Xaverian brother. He’s very generous to give me this tour as he told me in the first week I stay at the Alexian Brothers’ community. He often times said to people whom we met today that I should know other facilities of the Alexian Brother, not only Elk Grove Village. I could understand him because he works as a sort of animator at the SAMC (Saint Alexius Medical Center). He can easily get along with many people at this new hospital that was bought about 7 years ago from other owners. They develop and still develop until now this new hospital. We started from 6th floor to see the rooms till the first floor. I was introduced to the president and CEO of the SAMC, named Edward Goldberg, a short, chubby, nice Jew man. He gave me a souvenir, a big agenda book. Brother Gene also gave me a long blue shirt and a pen. We ate lunch at the cafeteria and continued to see other occupational clinic of the Alexian Brothers at other places then visited some brothers at Corporate Office located at Arlington Heights. It’s three-story building whose place of the Alexian Brother’s Provincial, Vocation Office, Finance Department, the President of Alexian Medical Center (Brother Tom), and archive (a sort of museum of the Alexian Brothers), etc. I was amazed by the rooms whose huge space and many employees work at this place. It’s like a company. I know some employees at this corporate office whom I met at the event of the Independence Day at the brothers’ community in the early of July 2005 and I met again at the concert at Alexian Field. One of them who knows me is Joan. She gave me some souvenirs of Alexian Brothers. I met some brothers whose office here, such as Larry (the provincial), Ted (the vocation director), Jim Classon and Jim Darby who gave me his picture when he met the Pope John Paul II in 1979 at Saint Peter Church, Chicago. Brother Jim Darby (84) was very delighted by my visit because he invites me a couple of times to visit his office and eventually with the kindness of Brother Eugene I could make it. They have their offices at the third floor.
So, today I got a lot of things from many people I met through the kindness and generosity of Brother Eugene Gizzi, an Italian descent of the Alexian Brother. He treated me to have ice cream at Dairy Queen before we went home. Once again I have privilege to know many facilities of the Alexian Brothers in medical health ministry. I admire Brother Eugene who tries to give spiritual color in his ministry at the SAMC, the Alexian Brothers’ spirituality to many people whom he meets daily. He often times makes a joke to some people there at the SAMC with saying, “Don’t forget one thing: ‘God loves you.’” This is the same message that he always says to me when he meets me everywhere. He’s 74 years old and still active and energetic to do many things by himself. He explained to me about many things at this tour. The beautiful chapel whose Mass daily at 11.30 a.m. he explained that some of the things in the chapel were made in Italy, Belgium and other places. Some stained glasses were taken from their old hospital in San Jose, California, Chicago, New Jersey and others. They focus to Midwest area because the other areas are far away and their number is decreasing. They closed their hospital in San Jose and the nursing school in Chicago.
I am amazed by the style of life the brothers here who do many little things at the house by themselves, for example Brother Ronald (90 years old) whose problem on his knees but he is still strong to walk and has a good memory and nice brother to get along with, always does laundry of his own clothes. The simplicity of life and the manual things in daily lives plus their autonomy to do household chores are evident that they are witness of this age as religious people. I realized that there are no servants at this brothers’ community to do such things. Each brother has responsibility on some works at this house. Once again they witness many good things in my station of life in this formation stage toward my missionary-religious-priesthood.
I had rest a while in the afternoon at my room and attended the Mass at 5.30 p.m., then had supper with the brothers, while Annie, my CPE classmate is on-call service today. In the evening I stayed at my room to write this journal and do some paper.
Saturday, July 30, 2005.
Awaking up at 6.30 in the morning I took shower, had breakfast at the cafeteria and prayed at the hospital chapel. Ten to eight, Annie who is on-call last night invited me to visit a patient who would have surgery today and I visited her and prayed with her. At 3rd floor, I met Annie who took care of CODE BLUE, a patient who endures hard time and the family was called up to come. She and I stayed with the family who came later on and we went to ICU. Father Andrew was called up to anoint the patient. At 8.30 a.m. Annie passed the on-call duty to me. I did initial visits to some 30 patients from 2nd to 6th floor. I got a page again from the patient at CCU and at the waiting room prayed with the husband who didn’t want to see her wife just passed away. Then I continued my visits. There were such diverse patients I visited today from their illnesses and background. I met a third generation of Japanese American decent, who feels that the US is his own country and doesn’t have will to see Japan. Today there were three patients passed away at CCU this morning, at Emergency room (I prayed with the family at the waiting room), and at Hospice (I prayed with the husband) at the patient’s room. At one p.m. I had lunch at the cafeteria then back to the fifth floor, the on-call chaplain room, put the data of my visit on the computer system. While I was doing this, I got a page from the Rehabilitation Center that two patients require communion; there is no Eucharistic Minister on Saturday. Since I have done my job to visit patients this afternoon, I answered the request and crossed the street to see the patients who wanted communion. The building of this rehab center is across the ABMC. It’s my first time entering and seeing patients at the first floor. I took a rest for a while at my room and watched TV. At 6 p.m. I took out food from the cafeteria and ate it at the chaplain’s room. I called up at the Xaverian philosophy house in Jakarta and I talked to Felix, the fourth year Xaverian student. From him I could know some information such as Father Silvano Laurenzi who is on vacation in Italy, got a car accident and his arm was broken. To use my time, I did read a book entitled Seeds of Sensitivity written by Robert J. Wicks and went to bed at 10.30 p.m.
Sunday, July 31, 2005.
At 00.14 early in the morning or in the midnight, the page went off; it woke me up from my silent night. It’s CODE BLUE that means I have to go directly without asking through telephone. I went to ICU and at the room 8 there was busyness of the medical staffs taking care of one 70 years old Japanese decent lady while the family was called up and came soon. I stayed with the family at the waiting room. I asked the religion or denomination of the patient and the daughter said that she has none then she said, “Jewish.” There were four children of the patients who were deeply mourning and I just kept remain with them in silent. Fortunately, there was the youngest sister of the patients who was present with them. She is a Japanese-American, born in Okinawa. She took care of the four children, whose Japanese faces. I guess this patient married with a Jew American and the children still have strong Asian feature even though their behavior and accent are American, the second generation of Japanese in the US, I am pretty sure. The aunt who was present with them is Christian and asked me to pray with them. I prayed the psalm with them. Until 3.15 a.m. I remained stay with them at the waiting room until they felt a sleep. I went back to my 5th floor room and slept.
At 5.30 I woke up and attended the Sunday Mass at the hospital chapel at 6 a.m. There were quite number of people coming to this early morning Mass. I asked the brothers who are they then Brother Ronald replied, “They are people who live around here, they are not staffs of the hospital. Probably they like to come here because they don’t need to pay to their parish in collection.” Father Andrew said the Mass and there were three brothers: Ronald, Ted and James Darby. At 6.30 a.m. I had breakfast at the cafeteria with the brothers. At 7.15 a.m. I called up Denis Guritno, a first year of the Xaverian philosophy student in Jakarta who just had first vows in July with his three other colleagues. Then, I called up Father Bruno Orru at Bintaro. He just finished his retreat and assembly with all Xaverian priests in Canosa retreat house in Bintaro, Jakarta including Deacon Petrus Hardiyanto. Father Bruno mentioned that the father of Father Jakobus Sriyatmoko, sx just passed away in Karanganyar, Central Java. Father Jakob couldn’t come to Indonesia soon. He works as formator at the Xaverian theology house in Yaounde, Cameroon. Let us pray for the father of Father Jakob and all the family so that the God, the source of life always gives them consolation in this difficult situation.
At 7.30 a.m. I went to the office of Spiritual Care Department of ABMC at Roncoli Center and took four messages from the mail voice of 6038 extension phone. Ten to eight Ken came in to the office and I gave the on-call chaplain stuffs (band roll for meal at the cafeteria, keys of the chaplain’s room at the fifth floor and the pager) to him. I went back to the house and slept soon. At noon I took shower and typed this journal. At 1.20 p.m. with Brothers Ronald and Victor, I went to the public library to send this via e-mail.
This is my Verbatim-3 I have presented last week in my CPE class:
MINISTRY REFLECTION FORMAT (VERBATIM)
I. DATA
CHAPLAIN NAME: DENNY WAHYUDI
MINISTRY REFLECTION: #3
DATE OF VISIT: July 15, 2005 DATE OF REPORT: July 25, 2005
PATIENT’S NAME (fictitious name): Ken
AGE/RACE/GENDER: 55/Brasilian/Male
FAITH AFFILIATION: Catholic
MARITAL STATUS: Married
NURSING UNIT: 6 West
TIME OF VISIT: 13.15 – 13.45
NUMBER OF TIMES VISITED THIS PERSON: initial visit
LENGTH OF VISIT: 30 minutes
INDICATE WHETHER VISIT IS WITH PATIENT/FAMILY MEMBER/STAFF: with his wife (from Bolivia) and one staff of dialysis.
STAFF CONSULTATIONS: a person who was doing dialysis.
DIAGNOSIS: PVD, Gangrene, Diabetic, Cellulitis.
II. REASON FOR PRESENTING THIS VISIT:
I present this Verbatim because I learn of the patient how he has handled his incessant suffering with joy, sense of humor, surrender, faithfulness to his wife, struggle of his faith together with his wife who takes care of him fervently. What strength he could have in three-time a week coming to the hospital for dialysis treatment that has been almost 8 years? Many issues are pertained at this situation of the patient. I admire his patience and acceptance of his life situation.
III. PREPARATION FOR VISIT/PREVIOUS VISITS:
As usual I did initial visit and often times I didn’t have good experience visiting this unit but this time the patient was new and he and his wife accepted me very nicely. Even, they have been waiting for the chaplain who can share the Body of Christ.
IV. CLINICAL OBSERVATIONS:
- Focus on physical setting: the patient was on the bed while a PCT man sit on a chair, took care of dialysis machine at the room. The patient’s wife was present as well at this room. I couldn’t see the face of the patient because the dialysis machine was blocking his bed and his head.
- Focus on the person: the patient was lying on the bed, trying to see me as I entered the room. His toe was banded because of injured. The patient was very joyful when I came to visit him. He started to talk and alternately with his wife they told many stories to me in which once in a while I asked questions to know more about them.
V. THE VISIT
C = Chaplain
P = Parishioner
N = PCT man
W = Wife
C1: (I saw a dialysis machine at the room while the PCT man sit on a chair in front of the machine facing the patient. It’s the only patient at this isolation room). Excuse me, may I come in?
N: (The PCT man stood up and welcomed me). Sure, you can come in, please.
C2: Hi, I’m Denny. I’m a chaplain of this unit. (I introduced to a woman who was standing close to the door and she’s the patient’s wife).
W1: You’re a chaplain? Nice to see you. It seems that I have seen you before. You have longer hair before, right? Yes, last time I met you at this hospital.
C3: Sorry, maybe that’s not me because I am new here. (I tried to greet the patient who moved his head and looked at me while the dialysis machine blocked his sight to me).
Hi, how are you, Mr. Ken? I’m Denny, a chaplain here.
W2: (The wife was approaching the patient on the bed and trying to explain about me to the patient. Then she moved to other side of the bed, close to the window). He’s a chaplain, we need him for spiritual need. He will give you the holy host.
P1: Hi, welcome. (The patient shook my hand and introduced himself. It seems to me that he was very pleasant to know my presence and he’d been waiting for chaplain’s visit). She’s my wife. She’s more spiritual than me. Sometimes, I don’t have faith but I try my best to believe. She helps me a lot in my faith and belief. (Both of them alternately speaking fluently in their Latinos accents, telling many things to me…).
C4: Where are you coming from originally, Mr. Ken?
P2: I’m from Brazil. I have been living in the US since 1960’s. My wife was coming earlier than me.
C5: And you (I talked to the wife), where are you from?
W3: I’m from Bolivia.
C6: O, Bolivia? La Paz? That’s what I know that La Paz is the capital city of Bolivia, right?
W4: Yes, I’m from…(the chaplain forgets now what city or town is she from in Bolivia).
C7: What brought you here, Mr. Ken?
P3: I have been in pain and suffering situation since the beginning of this year. I come to the hospital many, many times. Operation here, here, here and now my toe gets infection. I’m in diabetes, so it’s difficult to be healed (the patient pointed and showed his banded toe).
C8: And this machine (I was puzzled by the machine of dialysis that I never know the name) what is this?
P4: This is dialysis machine. I have kidney failure, so I have to do this treatment periodically.
C9: (I’m very concern how much money for this medical treatment, and I just kept it in my mind). How many times do you have this dialysis and since when do you have it?
P5: Three times a week.
W5: It’s been 7 years.
P6: In September it would be 8 years.
C10: So, you always come here to this hospital for this treatment?
P7: O ya, the place is across the street.
C11: Your wife takes you there to have dialysis?
P8: There is a car that picks me up, about 9 o’clock in the morning then I have the dialysis starts at 12 o’clock to 3 p.m. Actually only three hours, but I have to prepare some hours to go and to wait at the patient’s room.
C12: So, now you have to stay here at the hospital?
P9: Yes, because I have wound at my toe because of my diabetes, so I have to stay.
C13: How long have you been living in the USA?
P10: When I was young, in the 60’s. I worked for 30 years then retired. My wife is taking care of me, especially after I got sick 8 years ago.
C14: What did you do when you’re young? I mean your job?
P11: I was a truck driver, a big truck, like trailer. I had traveled a lot to all over the states, even to Canada. But in Canada, the roads were not good. They were not as wide as in the US. It’s difficult to drive in Canada.
C15: You had worked hard when you’re young and now you have to be patient in your sickness. How about your wife, do you also work?
W6: I used to work but now I don’t work anymore. I have to take care of my husband.
C16: You’re a wonderful wife. You see, Mr. Ken, you’re lucky, you have a faithful wife who takes care of you.
P12: Yes, she’s been my angel. I love her so much. She helps me in spiritual life as well. It’s important in my life. You come here, I’m glad that keep me in a good care spiritually.
C17: It’s my pleasure to meet you here. Your experience and your spirituality are wonderful to me. It’s amazing to me, how you endure this sickness in your age and your relationship with your wife, really it gives me strength to do my job as a chaplain. I’m very impressed by your life, Mr. and Mrs. Ken. How long have you been married?
P13: Yes, we try to be helpful and faithful to each other. It’s been over 25 years.
C18: How many children do you have?
W7: We don’t have any children.
C19: I’m sorry. But, I see both of you have good relationship and happy in your way.
P14: Really….actually (joking or teasing his wife) I plan to divorce her….
W8: Are you sure? (smile…)
P15: No, just kidding….I know many of my family they divorce even though they have children. But, I don’t know we are still here together in spite of my sickness. She still loves me and remains faithful to me and of course I love her. She is a good helper to me. It’s wonderful life that I have to be grateful for.
C20: You’re a good witness to me and to your extended family. You fulfilled and accomplished each other in your uniqueness.
Now, what I can help you in the spiritual needs?
P16: We love to have communion and prayer.
C21: Sure, I bring communion with me now and I can offer to both of you. Are you ready to pray and receive communion now?
P17: Yes, sure, we’re ready.
C22: Let us pause a moment in silence and pray. Most merciful God, thank you for your grace that you have given to each one of us personal love and this beautiful day. Thank you for your kindness and love to Mr. Ken and his wife that you have them to meet me today. We continue to pray for Mr. Ken so that in this special moment, special place and special treatment of the doctors and nurses would help him to this healing process in his body, peace in his mind, spirit and soul. We ask this through Christ, our Lord. Before we receive communion, the Body of Christ, let us ask pardon to God for our sins and weaknesses. Lord have mercy, Christ have mercy, Lord have mercy. Lamb of God who takes away the sins of the world have mercy on us (2x), Lamb of God who takes away the sins of the world, grant us peace. This is the body of Christ, the Lamb of God who takes away the sins of the world, happy are we who are called to this supper. Lord, I’m not worthy to receive you but only say the word and I shall be healed. Mr. Ken this is the body of Christ who gives you healing power. Amen. The body of Christ, Mrs. Ken. Amen. (Pause a moment) Let us pray, Almighty God, thank you for your kindness to us through the Body of Christ that Mr. and Mrs. Ken have received today. We surrender to your love and will so that with this faith you grant healing to Mr. Ken in body, spirit, soul and mind. Through Christ our Lord. Amen.
Thank you, If you need other spiritual needs just let me know, OK? We are available for 24 hours. There is a chaplain on-call if you need, just ask the nurse, OK?
There is also a chapel at the first floor. The Mass every weekdays at 5.30 p.m., you’re welcome (I invited the wife) to attend the Mass, OK?
W9: Thank you, I will see. Thank you very much. Come again tomorrow.
P18: Thank you, it’s nice to see you….it’s very important to receive communion even though sometimes I don’t have enough faith. Thank you, anyway.
C23: Thank you, it’s my pleasure to talk to you….have a wonderful evening. Bye…
VI. ANALYSIS OF YOUR MINISTRY
A. CHAPLAIN: I felt that every time I visited this room, I didn’t have good experience. But, today I have different experience. They welcomed me very nicely. During my visit, the patient and the wife were very actively engaging in the conversation and I felt the time was running very fast. After the visit, I felt very good and I had enthusiasm to visit them again. I open to the flexibility of the patient and family before I enter the room. I asked the dialysis man to enter and he allowed me to enter. I don’t know what I could do differently in this visit. I felt that I have done good things.
B. PATIENT: The patient was feeling joyous as I saw his expression. He likes telling jokes, humorous to me and to his wife. He appreciated and welcomed my visit. He is an open minded man and very talkative. Behind the happiness they expressed, I saw bit sadness and depressing on their perseverance of the patient’s disease, especially different and many surgeries he has endured this year. They don’t have any children, so I guess they appreciate my presence that in some way fulfill their loneliness in this medical treatment. They need other to talk since they have severe health problem especially the patient/the husband. The religiosity of the wife supports the husband in this difficult situation. The main concern of the patient is to get healed soon and being perseverant in his disease that I am sure cost many things in his life.
C. CAREGIVER: The wife is very concern of the patient. She is very faithful spouse in this difficult situation. She has good spiritual life that influences the husband. I see the mourning on her face. She looks older than her husband. She felt very happy when I was coming to give them communion and prayed with them. She was in Catholic (monastery) education when she was young. She almost became a nun as she told me. Her active engaging to my visit is a sign of her eagerness to have others in their family. They need someone to hear them.
D. FAMILY DYNAMICS/SYSTEMS: The patient is from Brazil and the wife from Bolivia. They came to the US when they were young and I guess they know each other when they were coming in the US. They are Catholic and especially the wife is very faithful fellow. Their family dynamic has been tested in many ways in ups and downs. The problem of divorce in their extended family, apparently, doesn’t bother them to keep their marriage over than 25 years in spite of they don’t have any children. They support each other with their jokes and their capacity to talk and tell stories. I am sure they have good relationship as husband and wife. The Latinos family has strong bond in the relationship to extended family, so I see they learn of others family and take positive things that they practice in their family dynamic. Their relationship, I believe help the patient to be perseverant in his severe sickness. The wife is very concern of her husband in many ways and it helps the healing process of the husband. The faithfulness of this couple is just struck me. I don’t experience it in my family/ my parents. My father gave a not good example in this faithfulness value. I am amazed, wondered to this family.
E. HUMAN THEMES: Warm welcoming to guests, faithfulness to the spouse in marriage life, hope and perseverance in medical treatment, humor/joy in the suffering, faith in Catholic spirituality. One primary theme here is FAITHFULNESS.
F. THEOLOGICAL THEMES: Hope, communion, in sickness (suffering) they have happiness to endure and fill their life…deep meaning on their hearts facing this life. One theme I can see here is the marriage promise to be faithful to each other in the bad and luck situation. I see that this couple has strong trust and faithfulness to each other. In spite of the sickness and no children in their family, they still nurture and help each other. What a wonderful life witness. Their faith and life giving to each other nurture their togetherness in good and bad situations.
I am very impressed by this couple in many ways especially in their faithfulness to each other for so many years in their marriage, they still belong each other. Every time I see the witness of the couple to be faithful in many years, I tend to admire them and follow their example as I continue to journey my vocation in the religious life and priesthood. The key point of their faithfulness is I guess their commitment to each other, to give their whole life in good and bad luck. My commitment to my religious life especially to my confreres would be tested in my loyalty and concern to others especially in their needs. How can I be loyal and faithful plus helpful to my confreres who have to endure many ‘sickness’? How do I contribute myself to my religious congregation in good and bad situation? My real commitment would be seen in the future years that I should not have many complaints to it but what can I give to my congregation who has been nurturing me in this vocation life in many ways (spiritually, economically, mentally, identity, etc.).
G. KEY LEARNINGS: I open to possibility of the patient and family in engaging the conversation. If they accept and welcome me, I am triggered to be attentive to be there and listening to them plus active sharing to them. I think this visit improves my learning goal (professional goals) that is ability to apply what I have learned on my clinical visit. I think it comes naturally as I continue to do my daily visit to patients.
H. PASTORAL CARE: I learned of this visit that I should engage the patient and the wife in conversation equally, to be a good listener and appreciate their sacred and secret story, eye contact and to both of them, my gesture and my face that respect to their presence. The patient and the wife have good acceptance welcoming me, so I felt at home to continue the conversation and follow up visit.
I did this ministry as a chaplain, Eucharistic minister, friend, child/son, and spreading good news such as telling the Mass at the hospital chapel that eventually the wife attended the Masses twice. I helped her to find the prayer book and opened the pages for the evening prayer.
For the future pastoral care: to be with them in my visit and accept their talkative behavior is already a precious gift for them in enduring the situation of sever disease of the patient. How do I stand and to be faithful in the medical treatment that I have to come to the hospital three times a week to have dialysis? It affects many aspects of my life if it happens to me.
I. CHARTING: I did the initial visit. I was attentively listening to the patient and the wife. I did prayer and communion to the patient and the wife.
VII. SHARING THE LOAD
O Almighty and merciful God, you know the meaning of the perseverance of human being in their suffering. Thank you for the witness you give to me through Mr. Ken that in his severe sickness, you still grant him love, faith and hope to continue his life in this world. Thank you for your grace of their faithfulness to each other a Catholic family in their more than 25 years marriage. It’s really a life witness to others in this post-modern world, which embraces divorce culture in their marriages. I pray to you, O God to give them strength to continue their daily journey in their difficult situation and I believe that you always are present with them, bearing their cross. I commend and surrender to you, O merciful God, this holy family till the end of their life. Amen.
O God, thank you for your grace that you have given to me, especially the witness of this couple who express their faithfulness to each other in their difficult situation. It’s a wonderful example I ever have in my clinical visit that empowered me to continue my journey to serve you and others in my ministry and my whole life. Help me to be like them that is life-giving symbol of your own faithfulness as my God and my Lord. Amen.
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